sábado, septiembre 19, 2009

Band-aids for the heart

There are times when you realise you've grown as a person and that you've left behing a phase of your life. It's like being a witness to your own History.

My phase has had its own soundtrack, special effects and good amount of props... and I survived. There have been things I haven't been proud of, but that I am already taking into account to prevent them later. In fact, I'll probably learn a great deal from them. And then there have been other things that have helped me to know myself better, to know what I'm willing to do and what I'm capable of. Those things, as of today, make me feel confident and very, very proud of myself. I've fought with other people, with the circumstances and with myself, and I think I've won most of the times. I know I'm flawed, a bit neurotic and somehow paranoid, but I accept myself as I am, I try to mold those things that I like the least about myself and I'm proud to know that the good things I have are very good.

As everybody else, I seek to be a better person and I really think I'm on the good track. These past few months I've talked a lot with myself (not necessarily literally) and I've reached several important conclusions. The first one is that happiness doesn't come if you don't work for it, and that is hard work, and it's not worthy to get stuck on things that make you unhappy only because you think you must do them. The second one is that nobody owns my freedom and I have all the right to exercise it. If somebody else's well-being depends on restricting my freedom, that well-being is not such. I know this is all very easy in theory, but putting it in practice is not so simple, specially because we all have our own habits and neurosis that make this quite complicated half of the times.

From this phase I've come out renewed and almost rejuvenated. I've never felt more energetic, more willing to do things, to push myself, and to revisit things I thought forgotten.

I truly encourage everyone who reads this to analise if they're really happy and as free as they think they should be. Even if it hurts or is complicated, cut with those things that either make you unhappy or less free. I guarantee you will win more than you'll lose. I look forward to hearing from you.

1 lindezas:

Maggie May dijo...

metamorphis is incredible!


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